Peevish

I have what is quite possibly a ganglion cyst on my left index finger that I have been trying to get treated for quite a while. In December, I saw a very good hand doctor about it and I was supposed to return for a further look at it in March, but that appointment was postponed until tomorrow. But then I got a call a few days ago that Friday's appointment has now been postponed until May, so these continuing postponements are beginning to make me feel ever so peevish. It's tough enough as it is just to see a primary care doctor when you need to, but now it's getting downright next to impossible to get in to see any kind of specialist. You have to schedule appointments sometimes months in advance and even then, it appears that there is no guarantee that you'll get to see your specialist upon your scheduled appointment. It's bad enough that our health care system in this country is so broken, but now it appears to be worse than I thought. And I don't see any end in sight to this mess. Now, add to that aggravation the fact that in order to eat healthy and take care of yourself, you have to pay absolutely exhorbitant food prices that are almost becoming out of reach, and is it any wonder that my mood has been so sour lately? Overprocessed foods are cheaper, but less healthy for you. Organic and healthier foods are priced so high that I wince every time I buy them. It's enough to discourage people from eating well and as a result of all of this, I am seeing more and more overweight people who are costing our health care system even more to take care of because they can't afford to eat right. It all ends up in one mad spiral and no one seems to be taking matters in hand to rein things in. No one even seems to have come up with a good bold plan to fix health care and the economy. Candidates are speaking the same pabulum of solutions that every other candidate since the beginning of time have proposed. I'm growing weary of having to choose between health care and food. I want to take care of myself and make sure that I get the care I need, but if it means I can't afford good, healthy food options, it puts me in a real bind. And experts continue to say that it's just going to keep getting worse. Well, what I want to know is, how much worse, and for how long? When is the bottom going to fall out? When is the big crash going to come, and how long is it going to last, and how exactly did things reach this low point, anyhow? I want some answers, and I want them now.

IT'S ALL HEAD AND HEART

It amazes me how much working out is a head game in addition to just being a physical thing. If your heart isn't into it, you're not going to have a good workout, and that's exactly what happened last night when I went to work out. My heart just wasn't into it. I was distracted by how peevish I was feeling over my once again rescheduled appointment with the hand doctor in addition to some other things that were getting on my last nerve, and as a result, I had just a plain out bad night. I couldn't find the stamina to do things that I can normally achieve. And I know that it was purely my mood at play. I kept telling myself that, well, maybe the fact that I hadn't had nearly as much sleep as I would have liked in recent nights might have something to do with it, or maybe it was a factor of biorhythm, or the fact that it'd been a whole week since my last workout, or something else at play, but I know darn well that it was the fact that I really didn't feel like working out last night. In particular, it was that I just wasn't in the mood for a Speed & Agility session. I would have preferred to go to the Tuesday night Women's workout class, but we had our monthly Kent Civil War Society meeting that evening, so I couldn't go, and since Saturdays are now pretty much filled up for the rest of the spring, I can't go to the Saturday classes anymore, so I want to get in at least one, if not two, workouts a week. I don't mind mixing a Tuesday night Women's Fitness and then going back Wednesday for a Speed & Agility, but due to my schedule of late, I can't make the Women's class as often as I'd like, and that's the class I actually prefer to go to. So I guess that the fact that my heart wasn't really into it last night was the reason for a night where I just couldn't seem to summon the energy to do my usual level of workout. Really, most of this stuff is in your head. If you want it bad enough, you can make your body do anything, but if you're not into it, your body won't respond as you'd like it to. The mind and body are connected, so much more so than people think. Ask any athlete and they'll tell you that this is true. Ask anyone who does yoga or T'ai Chi or any of the other Eastern arts. The body is truly an amazing holistic system of mind, body and soul.